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Center For Mindful Relationships: More Harmonious Life

Center For Mindful Relationships: Make intimate relationships more harmonious, mindfulness that you don’t know.

Mindfulness is a kind of consciousness produced by consciously paying attention to the experience of the moment in an open, accepting, and non-judgmental way.

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Center For Mindful Relationships: More Harmonious Life

Center For Mindful Relationships: Make intimate relationships more harmonious, mindfulness that you don’t know.

Today’s fast-paced life makes most people feel physically and mentally exhausted. Stress, tension, anxiety, boredom, and other distracting thoughts have put a heavy shackle on our hearts. To liberate our minds and improve our inner state, we choose the way of mindfulness training, which can not only reduce or even eliminate physical and mental symptoms but also improve the individual’s positive psychological quality and make our hearts more peaceful.

Mindfulness is a kind of consciousness produced by consciously paying attention to the experience of the moment in an open, accepting, and non-judgmental way.

In recent years, mindfulness has played a decisive role in self-adjustment and self-integration. Research in intimate relationships has gradually attracted academic attention, and researchers have gradually realized the benefits of mindfulness in intimate relationships.

Center For Mindful Relationships
How does mindfulness affect intimacy?

Karremans’ team found that systematic mindfulness intervention can enhance the relationship satisfaction between partners, increase acceptance and intimacy, and also help partners constructively cope with relationship conflicts. Relationship satisfaction and the response to the conflict are the main indicators of intimacy.

From the perspective of dualistic interaction, a theoretical model of how mindfulness affects the process and results of intimate relationships has been proposed, which provides theoretical support for us to better understand mindfulness within the dualistic framework.

Mindfulness can affect intimacy through four mechanisms: awareness of inner experience, emotional regulation, executive control, and the connection between the self and others.

Specifically, mindfulness emphasizes focusing on all experiences in a non-judgmental manner, including external physical feelings and internal emotional thinking, rather than distorting or ignoring them. These four mechanisms also affect the individual’s cognition, emotion, and behavior of intimate relationships.

Interpret this influence from two aspects: enhancing the positive influence and reducing the negative influence:

Center For Mindful Relationships

1) Mindfulness improves the individual’s awareness of impulsive behavior, pays attention to the long-term development of the relationship, and responds to conflict constructively through self-regulation, to avoid the deterioration of the relationship. In this process, mindfulness not only reduces the automatic response, but also increases the response tendency of beneficial relationships, such as sacrificing self-interest, restraining the motivation of revenge, and resisting the attraction of other sexes;

Center For Mindful Relationships

2) Mindfulness helps individuals detect potential stressors, improve their ability to cope with stress, and help prevent stress spillover, that is, reduce the threat of external pressure to intimate relationships;

Center For Mindful Relationships

3) Safe attachment is conducive to the establishment and maintenance of relationships;

Center For Mindful Relationships

4) Acceptance in mindfulness can enhance the individual’s non-judgmental attitude towards imperfect partners and relationships, thereby reducing over-beautification and preventing relationship deterioration.

Therefore, the influence of mindfulness on intimate relationships further reflects the role of mindfulness in intimate relationships. It can play a protective function, make the intimate relationship feel more harmonious, and also enhance the relationship satisfaction of both parties, improve the ability of emotional regulation, and prevent troubles. Before it happens, effectively prevent and avoid potential threats;

It also has a remedial function, which can help couples in crisis to improve their relationship together, such as alleviating psychological distress caused by conflict, changing bad interaction patterns between partners, and making the relationship more harmonious.

Good interaction patterns and acceptance in relationships are very important factors for maintaining intimacy. Helping partners to be aware of each other’s interaction patterns is the key to improving relationships, and through the advancement of intervention projects, it also proves that mindfulness has a significant effect on intimacy. The positive impact can indeed increase the satisfaction of the couple to some extent, reduce the conflict in the relationship, and improve the quality of the relationship.

Center For Mindful Relationships
In daily life, how should we apply mindfulness to improve intimacy?

We can also perform simple mindfulness exercises for 15 minutes a day, such as body scanning, mindful breathing, open consciousness, sitting meditation and love meditation, and joint practice between partners. The application of mindfulness in intimate relationships is different according to the different states of partners. For example, for prospective parents who are about to welcome their first child, the common practice between partners can be practiced in the following ways:

Center For Mindful Relationships

1) Mindfulness of self: partners practice mindfulness appreciation and housework together at home; for example, in the process of doing housework and washing dishes, feel the temperature of the water flowing into the palm and the flow through the palm, focusing on the present, replacing those complaints about the sound of quarreling;

Center For Mindful Relationships

2) Mindfulness towards your partner: The partners practice mindfulness hugs at home together, develop pause strategies, etc.; for example, in the moment of hugging, feel each other’s heartbeat, experience the warmth of being with each other, experience the feeling of hugging at that moment, enjoy the moment, replace it Those hugs without quality;

Center For Mindful Relationships

3) Mindfulness of intimacy: partners practice together at home to reflect on the origin of life, discover and share each other’s needs and dreams, etc.;

Center For Mindful Relationships

4) Mindfulness towards the family: the partners practice love meditation together at home, and understand the clues of the baby, etc.

I believe that through this simple mode of training interaction, we can make our relationship closer and make our intimate relationship more harmonious.

Mindfulness, as an auxiliary way to improve intimacy, is indeed very effective in improving the satisfaction of intimacy. In addition, to maintain better intimacy, more importantly, it should also be reflected in every word and deed in life.

“In romantic love, the most beautiful thing is the confused and lonely ‘I’, disappearing into the ‘us’ “, the fusion of each other’s hearts is the beauty of intimacy.

Center For Mindful Relationships: Love is a practice. Maintaining the beauty of intimacy is our life’s homework. Let us cultivate our body with mindfulness, cultivate our hearts, pay attention to the present moment, and devote ourselves to all aspects of life and feel the smallness of ordinary life. Isn’t it beautiful?

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— About The Writer —

Cedric S, a psychologist, and a writer from the other side of the earth. Focus on relationship psychology.

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