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How To Attract Husband Physically? Find The Passion With Your Husband

How to make the sexual attraction between partners never dissipate?

How to do without passion between husband?

How to attract husband physically?

Today, let’s talk about sexual attraction between partners.

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First, the concept of sexual attraction:

“Is the sexual attraction between two people equal to one-sided sexual attraction?” The answer must be yes and absolutely NO!

Esther Perel, a marriage expert from Belgium, specializes in extramarital affairs. She shared a real case.


Terry is facing a major turning point in his life – like all middle-aged crisis stories, he is addicted to the young nanny. This passion awakened him from a dead state. “I want to have something with her, and I don’t know why I haven’t done it yet. I’m afraid to do it, but I’m also afraid not to do it myself. ” But he loves his wife deeply. No matter from the aspect of appearance, figure, or spiritual fit, his wife is superior to the nanny.


As a psychotherapist, Perel has taken on numerous similar cases. It’s not only the husband, but also the wife, who loses the desire for the beloved one. She was surprised that so many people live less passionate sex at home and enjoy more imaginative sex outside of it – extramarital affairs, pornography, or online sex.

How to attract husband physically?
1.Is marriage and passion a pair of enemies?

Why? Are marriage and passion a pair of enemies?

Marriage, or a stable relationship, does not necessarily mean that passion will disappear. The two are not mutually reinforcing. This is exemplified by many sexual marriages that remain passionate.

In a relationship, the disappearance of sexual attraction usually comes from our pursuit of extreme intimacy in love – that is, when security and stability become stagnant, danger and stimulation make us feel reborn. This is the deep psychological reason that many couples often ignore.

So time is not the culprit that makes passion disappear. Whether the other half is in good shape or not is not a decisive factor. Those who say that love is no more than time can shut up!

She used her own experience to prove this. During the survey, when chatting with people from all over the world, Perel would ask them, under what circumstances do you think your partner is the most attractive?

She found that the following answers recurred in people’s responses: “when we meet again, when the other person is confident in working, or when the other person is surprised.”

Everyone is multifaceted, and with some distance to examine just provides us with a new perspective. Just like the diamond on a wedding ring, it is common to wear it on your hand every day, but occasionally you take it off and look at the light, and you will still be moved by its dazzling light. This freshness is the aphrodisiac of desire.

How to attract husband physically?
2. The key to keeping fresh is erotic intelligence

It’s human nature to like the new and dislike the old. The key to keeping fresh is whether we become stagnant and lose our space in a relationship?

According to Perel, sex is not a thing to do, but a place to go. We express ourselves in sex. It is not an act, but a poetic language.

She calls the ability to use this language “erotic intelligence”, which includes taste, freshness, curiosity, mystery, and the core is imagination.

To maintain the passion between husband and wife, the key lies in the coordination of two basic needs: on the one hand, our need for security, predictability, security, reliability, dependability, and eternal love. All the details of life that can provide us with a solid and stable experience are what we call “home”. But at the same time, both men and women, we also have another strong need – that is, the desire for adventure, novelty, mystery, danger, risk, and the unknown and surprise.

On the one hand, we yearn for intimacy with our lovers, but on the other hand, we seek the stimulation of arousing desire, and the two are naturally compatible.

Although it is generally believed that sex-based on intimacy and trust is better, the fact is that intimacy can stifle desire. When the person we love becomes a safe and stable harbor, he/she will be desexualized.

The factors that generate desire are just not conducive to love: jealousy, possessiveness, aggressiveness, domination, power Similarly, the factors that can arouse the desire to the greatest extent are mostly “politically incorrect”, such as role exchange, master-slave game, or forced love.

How to attract husband physically?
3. How to satisfy our desire for adventure and freshness?

Most people are more concerned about:

“So, how can we satisfy our desire for adventure and freshness when the love relationship turns to family routine? In his speech, Perel used two very precise verbs to describe love and desire. “Love is to have, and desire is to want,” she said

“In love, we want to have and know our lover. We hope to shorten the distance, narrow the gap, reconcile tension and enhance intimacy. In terms of sexuality, we don’t want to repeat the way we came. The same ending can’t keep us interested. In desire, what we want is an Iraqi on the waterside, who we can visit, spend time with, and explore each other’s forbidden area. In desire, what we want to find is a bridge of communication. In other words, desire needs space. “

“We can make friends in our imagination without having to take action. We can feel strong expectations, it makes desire stronger. In the experience of imagination, everything seems to have happened, but nothing happened. ” And the crisis of desire is often the crisis of imagination. Because we know each other like the palm of our hand, we lose the space of imagination.

Let’s go back to Terry’s story at the beginning of the article. Under the guidance of Perel, the passion aroused by the young nanny has become a fantasy that people can enjoy without harming the marriage relationship. This secret fantasy also allows Terry to look at his wife with a lustful eye again. When they had dinner together, their wife talked about her former boyfriend, which made them both feel sexually excited. Perel suggests that Terry shares some of his fantasies with his wife and that these little transgressions can help them rekindle their lust.

In a word, the best way to balance the needs of security and stimulation is to leave proper space for yourself and each other. Too close is blind, too familiar and boring. Only by leaving a little space for each other can we maintain a more complete self, and release the fresh and mysterious side of each other from time to time, so that each other can display their imagination.

How to attract husband physically?
4. What behaviors lead to the disappearance of sexual attraction?

You may want to know:

How to define intimate behaviors that lead to the disappearance of sexual attraction? For example, in the process of sexual intercourse, many people emphasize the importance of being frank with each other. “If you want to spend a good night with your lover, why don’t you just tell him or her?”

Perel is against this view. She firmly believes that understanding each other can not solve everything, but suggests that couples maintain some vague and ambiguous interaction. Hidden, mysterious, and suggestive attraction can bring strong pleasure to desire.

For another example, you are used to the fact that the other person is naked and has no so-called privacy. The more common joke is that you can leave the toilet door unlocked even if you go to a large size. On the one hand, it can be regarded as a signal of absolute trust and confidence. In Perel’s eyes, this may be the “intimacy” that destroys each other’s passion. All in all, there is no need for good law-abiding citizens in bed.

As Luis, a Spanish director, put it, “sex without sin is as insipid as an egg without salt.”

This puts forward extremely high requirements for everyone who may become the partner of others. Because everyone hopes that the other half is not only soul confidant but also passionate lover; pacify the soul and bring stimulation at the same time; give freshness and keep intimate at the same time; let me live a stable life and surprise me at the same time It’s not a simple problem to solve with sex toys and sexy pajamas.

How to attract husband physically?
5. The secret of maintaining sexual attraction

Perel also summed up some tips for us:

First of all, please keep more privacy in your sex life. Learn to buy a high-grade sexy robe, and never walk around in front of people who will see you 365 days and nights.

Everyone keeps some space to develop their passion and manages themselves in a planned way. Fitness, body management, sexy practice In this space, you want to show yourself in passion and wait to explore.

Secondly, both of us should understand that passion, like the moon, has its ups and downs. It will fade intermittently, but the point is to understand that desire will not fall from the sky.

Perhaps the thoughts of human beings are engraved into our souls when Eve ate the first forbidden fruit. However, the so-called “time”, that is, the loss of freshness, is not invincible.

Perel has traveled all over the world and seen all kinds of extramarital affairs. Many of them mentioned that extramarital affairs make them feel “alive”. They don’t want to run away from their partner, they want to run away from themselves; they’re not looking for another person, they’re looking for another self.

How to attract husband physically?

The most wrong way is to find yourself in others.

Only by keeping yourself fresh and loving yourself, can you make the people you love more infatuated with the multi-faceted you who are constantly growing and brave to change.

If you have something to gain, please forward this article to let more people learn to save the passion between lovers.

Love is fragile, desire is perishable.

You might also be interested in: How To Get An Avoidant To Chase You? Knowing Him And Shoot His Heart
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– About The Writer –

I am Cedric S, a psychologist, and a writer from the other side of the earth. Focus on:

1. Relationship: dating/chatting/breaking up

2. Psychology: relationship/marriage psychology

3. Sex Science

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