Should I tell my ex I miss him? In many of my counseling cases, many people have a special obsession with their exes.
They know that it is impossible to be together with their exes, but at the same time, they are full of attachment to them and do not want to forget them. This is the case with Cathy, who is still hesitant to call her ex even though she knows she is getting married tomorrow.
In fact, even if it is played and how can it be? Should I tell him I miss him after a break up? Can a guy leave his current one behind and turn around to renew his relationship with her? Can you still do ordinary friends on the cloud?
Very often we know that it is impossible, but why is it still difficult to put down the heart of the obsession?
Can I tell my ex I miss him? There is a good saying: “The unavailable is always stirring, the favored is always emboldened”.
Why do we have trouble letting go of the one you can’t have? The following we will be from the perspective of psychology for you to deep analysis.
Internal phenolphthalein withdrawal release sound
Should I tell my ex I miss him? When people fall in love, a chemical element – dopamine – is released in the body, which in turn promotes the secretion of endorphins in the body.
Endorphins are near-addictive pleasures that are effective in stopping pain and are pleasurable. Many addictive drugs promote the secretion of endorphins in the body, such as marijuana and nicotine.
When people fall out of love, the chemical element that produces endorphins, dopamine, is cut off.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? Then, without the continuous supply of endorphins, the body will be as hard to quit as it is to quit smoking and drug addiction.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? There is a particularly famous concept in economics called “sunk cost”.
It is said that
” When people decide whether to do something, they not only look at whether it is good for them, but also look at whether they have already invested in this thing in the past.
We have already occurred these unrecoverable expenses, such as time, money, energy, etc. called “Sunk Cost” (Sunk Cost).
So when you pay a lot of feelings and energy to a relationship, you will be difficult to simply give it up.
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Should I tell him I miss him after a break up? People very much like to get a sense of experience and conquest in love, once a task is difficult and there is external resistance, the impedance reaction instead makes people want it more.
Can I tell my ex I miss him? This is what inspires the rebellious mentality, the more frustrated the more courageous, the more rejected the more they feel that the other person is the real one, the one they want the most.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? Many poignant love stories are also derived from this, such as Romeo and Juliet, two people precisely because of the family’s opposition, resulting in a great rebellious psychology, but instead feel more in love with each other.
This is the famous Romeo and Juliet effect.
This is why the more you know that it is difficult to be with each other, but also want to be with each other, the more you can not let go of each other’s reasons.
Because of these physical and psychological elements, so it is difficult to let go of a relationship and completely forget about a person.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? So does this mean that we are stuck with it, unable to completely let go of our obsessions, and can only endure the inner torture?
Of course not, scientific control and targeted interception can help us get rid of this obsession and pain as early as possible.
How should we go about it specifically?
Should I tell my ex I miss him? There is a psychological term related to renunciation called targeted detachment.
Research shows that if a person cannot detach from an unattainable goal, it can be very painful, so learning to give up not only gives us relief, but also the ability to start a new goal.
There are four detailed, step-by-step steps to goal detachment.
The first step is called cognitive detachment.
Should I tell him I miss him after a break up? After a breakup, the reason why you can’t forget and keep holding on to hope is because you still have hope and are not willing to completely accept the reality.
So, if you want to come out completely, the first thing is to completely accept the fact that you broke up, clearly perceive that you can no longer be together, no longer to miss your former, try to use other things to keep their minds busy.
The second step is called emotional detachment.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? Everyone facing the loss of love will have sad, unrequited emotions, “You can accept the appearance of negative emotions, but refuse the behavior that comes with them.”
In short, you can have negative emotions, but you can’t allow them to influence your life and make your life bad.
Should I tell my ex I miss him? This is the time when you can find happiness and venting through materialistic and rewarding ways.
For example, you can set yourself some small goals and give yourself some small rewards for each one you accomplish.
The best way is to work out, because exercise also produces dopamine and endorphins that give you pleasure and addiction. Should I tell my ex I miss him? And it’s best to work out at an intensity that overwhelms you and exceeds your daily physical capabilities, thus creating a feeling of pleasure similar to self-abuse.
Many times, we are reluctant to accept this reality and are just resigned to the good that has been lost.
I’m Jocelyn, and I hope you will all meet someone who loves you. If you have emotional problems, you can ask me for advice. If you are single, maybe you can meet him/her on Bothlive.