TOPIC OF THIS ARTICLE:Repairing broken relationships
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Seven principles of repairing broken relationships.
In a close relationship, both people make mistakes. The common serious mistake in our life is cheating. In the cases I consulted, quite a few are cheating cases. Some derailment, may be irreparable, especially the other side of the iron heart derailment and you are the person who want to recover. This kind of situation, when the boy and girl friends, basically there is no hope of recovery.
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How to repairing broken relationships? The only possibility is that time may allow him to grow up and change his mind. After quite a while, he searched for her in many places. Suddenly, looking back, there was still a you standing behind him. It’s just whether you have the patience to wait, and whether you can still love him after being hurt.
How to repairing broken relationships? If it is in marriage, derailment has a high probability to be retrieved, but it is the person who can be retrieved. Whether the heart is back or not, each couple has its own differences. The reason why marriage derailment is relatively easy to recover is not emotion, but the powerful force of the social structure of marriage.
How to fix a broken relationship? And even if it’s recovered, the damage is great. For ordinary people, trust is fragile. Once it is hurt, it is difficult to recover. In the past, you always thought of everything as good. When you came back late, you worked overtime. When you went out to make a phone call, you didn’t want to make a noise. Now, if there is a slight disturbance, you must have been having an affair again. Any time when you are not around, inappropriate and illogical behavior will naturally remind the other party of an affair.
If the derailed party turns back sincerely, then the derailed party needs to do a lot of work to really repair trust. One is to truly understand one’s own mistakes, understand each other’s pain heart to heart, and constantly, even add weight to compensate, and take repairing trust as a lifelong task. But even so, it is very difficult to predict whether it can be reconciled. It also needs the injured party to really let go, so that you two can have a chance.
In addition, we may be making career choices, financial choices, family and friends priority choices, and we often hurt each other. In any relationship, it’s impossible and unhealthy not to quarrel. Sometimes our differences are so great that they are at stake.
Repairing this relationship is also a big challenge. In the previous lessons, we mentioned the practical skills of communication and how not to hurt the relationship. In today’s lesson, let’s talk about the seven principles that we need to remember when we want to repair the relationship if there is a rift
How to repairing broken relationships 1) You and your partner are equal.
How to fix a broken marriage: No matter whose fault is first, remember that it’s all happened in the past. Clarifying responsibilities is different from mending relationships. The responsibility needs to be clarified, because if things happened in the past are muddled down, they will pass away, which has no guiding significance for the future. If the mistakes in the past are not explained clearly, the possibility of committing them again will be even higher. But repairing relationships is not about the past, it’s about the future.
How to fix a broken marriage: When you decide to mend the relationship, make it clear that the two of you are equal. In fact, unequal relationships only lead to more tragedies. So instead of dominating and educating your partner, focus on cooperation. Share your thoughts with each other and work together to create the future you want to live together.
Respect. The other party just made a mistake, but he is still a person, and a person you want to spend your life with. Therefore, to maintain a respectful dialogue is not to make you condescend, but to set the tone of your relationship. That is to say, no matter what, you always respect each other’s independent identity, not each other’s affiliation.
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How to repairing broken relationships 2) Doing is more important than saying.
Fixing a broken relationship: Whether it is the injured party or the party who has hurt the other party and hopes to recover, more actions should be taken besides communication. Make sure you focus on the other person and take the initiative to do things that make them feel positive. It’s not avoidance, though avoidance is a more natural emotion. The injured party should also show sincerity by taking actions, accept his flowers, put them out exquisitely instead of throwing them aside, and make his favorite dishes instead of pretending to forget them.
How to repairing broken relationships 3) Build a new relationship.
Fixing a broken relationship: You know, your relationship is not the same as before. It’s a brand new relationship. Remember that principle. Problems in the past are due to flaws in a relationship. If you repeat the last relationship, the same flaws will lead to the same problems. So what you’re rebuilding is actually a new relationship. This new relationship can be established because you still have love or deep emotional ties with each other.
However, behavior, communication and reaction to things should be different from the past, so that they can not repeat the same mistakes. Treat it with a new attitude and behavior. We should constantly practice the various communication skills and principles we have learned before. The more difficult an emotional conversation is, the more persistent it is to complete it.
How to repairing broken relationships 4) Don’t make meaningless apologies.
Fixing a broken relationship: Don’t say, “I’m sorry you’re upset, but you started it first.” It’s not an apology. Any apology with “I’m wrong, but” structure is not an effective apology. On the contrary, they are often criticizing and criticizing.
The real apology, I call it the apology of the soul, is to realize that I really have a mistake that I can’t admit. No matter how hard it is, say it. Mistake this for a lost child. You are his parent. Only by admitting your mistake can you open up your relationship.
How to repairing broken relationships 5) Be responsible for your own happiness.
Fixing a broken relationship: Although a good relationship is to make each other more complete and happy, there is still only one source of true happiness, that is, yourself. Your efforts, your position in the world and your communication with the world are all around you.
Only in this way can you bring deep happiness to each other. If you build your spiritual world on the basis of relying on each other, you will not only be unhappy, but also make each other feel deeply burdened. This may also be the reason for the rift in your relationship.
I hope this crisis will enable you to really find yourself and be responsible for yourself. It’s like an oxygen mask on an airplane. Take care of yourself before taking care of others.
In fact, a crisis can help you clarify your true emotional situation. Always worried about losing each other, at this moment may find that your strength, in fact, does not come from each other, but from yourself.
How to repairing broken relationships 6) Learn to forgive.
Fixing a broken relationship: Forgiveness is the nature of giving. When we give to others, we are happier. It’s the same with forgiveness. Not pursuing homomorphic revenge is the highest correspondence to evil. Forgive each other’s mistakes and understand that we are all born with the dark side of evil.
True forgiveness can release our ability to love, make us more powerful, and help us weaken and heal the feeling of hurt.
How to repairing broken relationships 7) Pay attention to the quality of sex life.
Fixing a broken relationship: Sex is one of the most incredible forces from the subconscious. If you two still have a strong passion, there is hope that your relationship will make up for it.
If you hate each other’s bodies, then no matter how hard you try in cognition, the relationship may come to an end. Pay attention to the development of sexual power between you. It’s the voice of your heart.
How to repairing broken relationships? Today, we talked about the seven principles of saving and repairing relations, which are applicable to both sides. They are equality and respect. Doing is more important than saying. You are actually building a new relationship. Don’t make meaningless apologies. Happiness really comes from yourself rather than each other. Learn to forgive and pay attention to the quality of your sex life. It’s the voice of your heart that you should listen to.
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