There are obvious differences between spiritual love and carnal love. We should know how to distinguish them.
A famous writer was asked in an interview, “what if your partner is cheating?”
Without hesitation, she replied, “physical infidelity is only physical. It’s nothing. If you like, whether she is loyal or not is very good. From a human point of view, who he loves is also free and equal. “
In short, she believes that physical infidelity is not important, as long as spiritual loyalty.
But for most people, such comments are hard to accept. After all, in the traditional concept, the dual loyalty of body and spirit can be called love, otherwise it will be betrayal. Tao Hong’s words undoubtedly overthrow this concept, which is quite different from people’s cognition.
But in fact, in reality, we do not only pay attention to “spiritual love”, but do not force our partners to be physically loyal.
Ms. Li Yinhe, a famous Chinese sociologist, once studied a similar topic and pointed out: “there are specific standards for the boundaries and ways of getting along between husband and wife. As long as both parties are willing to bear the consequences, outsiders should not blame them at will.”
In other words, Li Yinhe believes that whether loyalty is a dual guarantee of body and spirit or just a spiritual constraint only depends on the cognition of both husband and wife. If they only need spiritual loyalty, then physical infidelity should not be criticized by outsiders.
Although such an idea is too open for ordinary people to fully understand, it must be admitted that such a case reveals a problem for us, that is, in reality, there is not only the dual love of body and spirit, but also the love of body and spirit.
These two are different from traditional love, each of which is worth exploring.
The so-called carnal love meaning , as the name suggests, is only sexual love, this kind of love is only for the purpose of having a relationship, without any emotional color.
Spiritual love is a kind of love in which both parties can’t realize carnal love, or they can’t and don’t want to have carnal love for various reasons, only for the purpose of spiritual communication.
Li Yinhe believes that this kind of love is more pure and pure because it is divorced from the original desire, but also full of deformity and regret because there is no physical communication.
In reality, there are essential differences between the two.
As a physiological relationship, carnal love pays more attention to the feeling of being together than its uniqueness. In other words, this kind of relationship is not stable. The other party can have this kind of love with you or with others. Once he feels bored, this kind of relationship will stop immediately.
What’s more, carnal love is often difficult to have results. As Zhang Ailing said, “the result of spiritual love is always marriage, while carnal love often stops at a certain stage, and there is little hope of marriage.”
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Two people only physical relationship, but no spiritual connection, then this relationship can only stay on the surface, such two people are difficult to get married.
This is also the reason why many people stay with people who have families, but they never want to divorce and marry them again. They just maintain a physical relationship, which is too shallow to make people have the impulse to get married.
What’s more, love with only physical but no spiritual communication is often a short-term choice of one party. When they are tired of it, the relationship will come to an abrupt end, so they will not consider the outcome of the relationship at all.
This also reminds us not to believe in carnal love too much. It’s just a temporary relationship. If you give your heart and think you can be treated gently, you may be hurt deeply.
In addition to carnal love, there is also spiritual love in reality. This kind of love is divided into many kinds, some people’s spiritual love, often because they can’t carry out physiological communication, and have to choose the way of love; And some people, because they have to abide by the agreement with their partner, have to only interact with others on the soul.
The former tends to give birth to poetic stories, just as Li Yinhe said: when two people fall into spiritual love, they will chew the beauty and freedom carefully, and they can swim freely, so as to reach a higher level.
This kind of love is divorced from the fireworks in reality, from all kinds of malpractices in life, and only exists in the spiritual world. It is precisely because it has become perfect, free and lasting.
The latter, in the secular definition, belongs to “betrayal”. They may enjoy the feeling of spiritual love, but because they bear the moral judgment, this kind of love is mixed with impurities, so strictly speaking, it does not belong to spiritual love.
It can be seen that spiritual love is an extremely difficult state. After all, the impulse of biological reason is almost human instinct, and it is an extremely powerful choice to suppress this instinct and directly rise to the spiritual height. Moreover, we should ensure that such a state is not adulterated with secular materials, which is a great test of human nature.
But as long as we get to this state, we may feel totally different.
Both spiritual love and carnal love are unique forms of love, but there is an obvious difference between them, that is, spiritual love is more difficult to achieve, purer and longer. And carnal love is only a temporary relationship, it is easy to be replaced, and there will be no result.
If you want to judge whether you want to choose spiritual love or carnal love, you can think about it from this point.
Of course, both carnal love and spiritual love have their disadvantages in reality. The former cannot go deep into the mind and is not stable enough, while the latter is too difficult to achieve.
Therefore, Li Yinhe believes that a really good state of love should be a mature love with body and mind. In this way, two people can not only have a physical feeling, but also can deepen their love to the height of thinking, which is more suitable for reality and will last longer.
Hope that adults can understand the difference between the two kinds of love, and recognize the importance of real love. Only the unity of spirit and body can promote the continuous development of love. With such love, maybe you will be happier.