Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it?
Your relationship is over. You somehow realize that there are things you should have done, but you didn’t do them. Here are the reasons why breakups make us sad when we think about them
1. Your identity is still tied to your ex
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? One of the hardest things about ending an intimate relationship is that when two people are tied together, they begin to accept each other for who they are. We show each other our likes and dislikes and preferences, and eventually adopt some of them together as a couple. When this tendency is overdeveloped, people become dependent on each other so that there is no separate “you” in the relationship, only the relationship.
When a breakup occurs, you may not know how to be a completely separate person. Depending on how long you’ve been with your ex, or how far you’ve come from one relationship to another, you sometimes can’t recognize yourself on a deep, intimate level. Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? Taking time alone, building a life that makes sense to you, and regaining a sense of empowered independence will help you find stability.
Read more: 20 Undying Love Quotes
2. You don’t want to grieve
When you see grief, you may feel overwhelmed by it all. After all, it’s painful to lose someone we love dearly, perhaps someone we thought we’d be with forever. Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? Facing loss means you feel as sad, angry and even desperate about your future as you did happy with your ex. The nature of grief causes some people to hide in denial.
They stay in active motion all the time, staying connected to new relationships, jobs and ongoing activities to avoid grief. Or they are so obsessed with their exes.
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? How connected, or so unthinking about what their ex is doing, not doing, thinking, and not thinking that in some way, they haven’t come to terms with the truth of their loss. Unless you let the grieving process continue, you will be stuck where you are. Grief is painful, but it follows a typical process of stages. Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? Most people who allow themselves to grieve will not only come out on the other side, but will commit to a richer and more meaningful life as a result.
3. You will not accept the loss of self-esteem
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? You have been humiliated. Your self-esteem is hurt. You feel rejected, abandoned or not good enough. These feelings are overwhelming, and while you will eventually deal with and recover from them, you turn to judgment, criticism, and even spying on your ex, distracting yourself with a heightened focus on your ex.
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? When it comes to ending a relationship, we usually protect ourselves by focusing on the flaws of the person who hurt us. Whether our thinking is correct or inaccurate, the more you obsess over your ex, the longer it will take to heal and move on, anyway.
4. You won’t change
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? You like the way things used to be. You loved spending time with your ex, doing your daily or weekly routines together, and being with your partner’s friends. Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? Now everything has changed. The longer you stay in the past, the harder it is to move on. Accept the fact that this particular life is over so that you can begin to build new routines and develop new relationships and activities that will bring you joy.
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? One reason people dwell on this is that when they are heartbroken, they are not motivated to do new things. Let yourself do it, no matter how sad you are. When you start doing a small thing, take your grief with you.
Can you join a new monthly book club, or a new fitness class, or consider taking a class or hiking or nature club? As your brain tunes in and you create a fulfilling life, any new things you do will eventually pay off.
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? The reason we feel hurt or sad after a breakup is that most of life’s greatest pain comes from loss. The loss of a loved one, the loss of a loved one, is in essence the loss of an important pillar of our existence that justifies our existence.
The loss of a loved one makes us unable to confirm our worth, are we a suitable person of the opposite sex?
And for love we invest too much emotion, but because of the departure of a person, what you have formed collapses.
Why do breakups hurt even when you wanted it? The best way to face loss is to let loss instead of loss, I once taught a way to spend the pain of lost love is to write out all your thoughts, anger, reluctance, fear, etc. for the other person, and when you have all the things written out, in essence, you also lose these emotions, and finally really send it away.
But isn’t life all about loss all the time?
I’m Jocelyn, and I hope you will all meet someone who loves you. If you have emotional problems, you can ask me for advice. If you are single, maybe you can meet him/her on Bothlive.